She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Randomize
