she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
