I like my sex mixed with concussions.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I just want nice things and good sex
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
