one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
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