Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
