Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
