Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
