Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
