is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
