It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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