Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
