I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
