i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
