i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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