return my video game
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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