i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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