i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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