he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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