Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
