i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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