Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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