you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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