Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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