we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
