I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
