We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
