so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
she peed on how many people?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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