He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
