just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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