How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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