your thong is hanging out like whoa
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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