On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
