I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize
