so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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