i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
