time to smoke my breakfast
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
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