would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
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