Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
