How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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