I just made out with a guy for $7.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I still have a little drunk in my system
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Randomize
