the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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