How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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