we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
