Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
