i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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