What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I have fence marks all over my body
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
