i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize