just come out here and I will go home with you...
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize