A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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