i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
